The Irishman Cometh

In the interests of obsessively cataloguing every detail of my life onto this site (which I have not been doing well enough lately) I want to report that on Tuesday, I took a night off work so that Marq and I could go to see comedian Dylan Moran as he begins a tour of Canada here in Halifax. I had a good time. Moran’s comedy consists of surreal tangents surrounding world-weary witticisms. In short, it appeals to me very much.

Sadly, though, I feel like the show didn’t sell out the way it deserved to. Looking behind me, I saw an awful lot of empty seats. Kinda made me feel like the city had let him down. I got to thinking, though, I wonder if it would have sold out if the students were still in town.

Now, I hate the students in this city and don’t miss them at all for the summer months, but there’s no denying they are a significant portion of our population here. We should look into finding some way to fill Halifax with a few more people, but ones who aren’t drunken idiots. That’d be welcome.

Anyway, in the unlikely event that someone in Canada finds this post in the next week or so, I suggest trying to get to one of his shows in some other city. In the more likely event that someone stumbles upon this post via a search engine a few years down the line, you’re here because I used the word “Irishman” aren’t you? Yeah, I can tell you are.

Super Sunday: Axkiller McGee and Hypnogre

I have enough villains sketched and colored to get me all the way through what remains of Supervillain Sunday year! Let’s get going:

Axkiller McGee

There is a group called the Weird Assassins. When a young girl discovered she had the ability to make any kind of ax, from battleaxes to hatchets, appear in her hand at will, she knew she could find a way to make that into a life. Luckily a love of money and a belief that human lives were not worth all that much meant that she could find work among the Weird Assassins, being hired to take on the strangest assassin cases in the business. Unlike many of the Weird Assassins, Axkiller McGee enjoys being a bit theatrical and will try to make her hits in as public a forum as she can while still expecting to get away. That kind of risk-taking has made her a frequent combatant against superheroes, which would normally be a no-no for an assassin, but her success rate means she is still able to find work.

I admit, after I drew this character it took me forever to come up with a name. Once I wrote down “Axkiller McGee” I knew I needed to take a break for a while. So I did. Anyway, I said when I made Killercat that I would probably do more Weird Assassins, and I knew this was a sketch that would fit into that loose-knit collection of killers for hire.

Hypnogre

The portal between Ogretropolis and this strange world called “Earth” is too small for an ogre to get through. But humans seem to be the perfect size for such dimensional travels. Hypnogre is an ogre hypnotist who has taken to controlling the minds of humans and forcing them to do his bidding, smuggling things to and from Earth to create a thriving criminal trade empire.

Full disclosure: Marq came up with the name “Hypnogre” after I complained to him that all the “best” ogre names (ie. Electrogre, Technogre, Necrogre, etc.) were all taken according to Google. The fact that an ogre hypnotist fit so well within my existing creations just proved it was meant to be.

Patrick’s Found Poetry Parade

Between work and school and trying to keep on top of SecGov Robots and the next year’s batch of Phone Guyses, I’ve had little time for ordinary posts on the site lately. Well, for one of my classes I had to produce a few “found poems” so I might as well throw them up on here, right? The correct answer is “right”.

Friendspeak (a found poem made from lines of texts between Marq and me)

I have a new phone.
It is one of those technology phones.
Consarnit.
I will still get the message in a robotic voice.
I am in Dartmouth.
Sports Entertainment.
Where will Kip be at?
Plenty of time, I suppose.
Yeppp.
I just now got your song picture.
Huggable angel statues.
A Larry David-looking guy’s car broke down in the rotary.
Traffic is nuts. I will be late.

Trust Us, We Are Human (a found poem made from Spam comments on This Very Website)

Oakland survived a shaky night.
We fix it.
Hardly is it possible to imagine that more such good exists.
I believe it’s just the way you search
within the mirror, not the amount.
What they did to him was senseless.
So do not be much too difficult on your self.
Do whatever you can
plus the relaxation will get the job done alone out.

Precognitive Robot (a found poem made from Kip’s text prediction application, which attempts to determine what you are trying to type before you finish.)

Dissidents,
Fairfax Hoffman’s
beforehand optioned.
Friday.
Sainsbury heights.
Yuri unstated,
Shenzhen good-looking.
Fifth liftoff urged Uhura
watch outright hunch.
Diuretic Puget
degree Nikkei.
proprio pointed
fight.

Action Mermaid Team

Action Mermaid Team

Action Mermaid Team:
A quartet of half-fish teens.
They live under the seas
and solve the mysteries.
Action Mermaid Teeeaaam: Unite!

It was months ago now that Marq thought up the name “Action Mermaid Team” and then I drew a picture of that team as I imagined them. I forgot about that picture for a long time, but today, while drawing superheroes, I figured why not put them on the site? They’re not an official Super Sunday thing, but it’s clearly created by the same impulse that drives me to make those.

Okay, so I figure they’re an 80s-style cartoon team. We made that little snippet of a theme song up there, and I figure there must be a leader one, an tough one, a smart one, and a wacky one. I also threw in their little octopus-lookin’ dude as their animal sidekick (who is actually the friendly spawn of some eldritch sea-being). I’m sure that we can all agree that this is a cartoon that should have been there when we were growing up.

Coming Not Soon Enough

So I said to Marq: “I bet I could convince a kid that hippos are just female rhinos.”

Though I only meant that I’d trick the kid for a conversation or so, he proceeded to plot out a brilliant scheme in which a billionaire might be able to raise a child in such a manner as to think this fact was true. He then took that to its logical conclusion: At some point, this victim would realize that something was up, and would try to escape. I decided that this is the best idea for a movie I’ve ever seen.

Just imagine it! An action-packed thrill-ride of our young protagonist careens from chase scene to chase scene, swordfights through exotic locales, and tracks down every lead to find out the truth that has been hidden so long. The truth that hippos are not just female rhinos.

Okay, Hollywood. We’re ready for millions.