Those of you who follow my life religiously and commit every detail to memory will recall the time I got hassled by the fuzz for just walking at night a couple years back. It just happened again. Once again I use this site as a place to log my time on the wrong side of the law.

There were some differences beyond it being two years later, of course. Take a moment to familiarize yourselves with the details of the old case and I will compare. This time I was dressed in all kinds of black clothing again, but instead of the rebel insignia, I was wearing a shirt with the Venture Brothers logo designed to look like a skull. I was stopped in front of the same gas station as before, but there was no backup. And instead of an attractive woman, the cop was a man. Still pretty attractive though, if you’re into that sort of thing. And I got some details on exactly why I was being questioned. Apparently it went beyond walking around a four in the morning. Get this: A man around my height with dark clothing has been, wait for it, Exposing Himself To People. I match the description of a Flasher.

You know, trenchcoats have a bad reputation, but usually I just have put up with the stereotype of dressing like all those idiot school shooters and psychotic loners and stuff. I mean, sure, I’ve had people comment on flashers wearing trenchcoats before, but generally that negative stereotype of we trenchcoat wearers is mentioned only occasionally. Now, the copper said the flasherman was wearing “dark clothes” so I don’t even know if he actually was wearing a trenchcoat himself or not. Either way, I hope he’s freakin’ happy making it just that much harder for people like me to wear trenchcoats and not be evil and suspicious looking.

Oh well. Stay tuned for the next adventure of PDR vs. RCMP, whenever it may occur.

I know I said my next post would be about Christmas, but that can wait. Something more important has arisen. Today I had a fortune cookie which delivered me not one, not two, not three- no wait! It was three. It had three fortunes in it.

• “You communicate a sense of harmony to others.”
• “You have a strong desire for personal freedom.”
• “You have a great deal of energy and self-reliance.”

This can only mean one thing: I am awesome. A cookie said so. Now those of you who had doubts can go become nuns. Especially the males.

I think that is all for now.

So it has been about nine months since my last post. The reason being: I was adopted by pirates. That, or it’s been a few weeks and I’ve just been lazy. Though I can use the slowness of my spyware filled browser as part of an excuse…

Now, on a daily basis I come up with fascinating things to write about on my little journal thing (and as you readers know, on a bi-annual basis I actually get around to posting one!) so let’s see if I can’t remember some of the things that occurred to me over the past few weeks, lest this become yet another post in which my only content is a reflection of the lack of content.

Winter has hit us here in Hali-town. We’ve had several snowfalls already. We’ve probably already had a quarter or more of the total snows we had last year, which I don’t remember being quite so busy. I have noted that these days any time it snows is referred to as a
“snowstorm”. It’s never just snowing anymore, it’s always a “snowstorm” and the whole city shuts down and schools are cancelled and people start crashing their cars all over the place and all that. I think back to my childhood and remember us actually getting far more snow and the city not breaking down. My question is: Has the snow actually somehow become more violent even though it usually clears up before we get towering snowbanks, or has the city just become one big collective weather wuss?

It also occurred to me at one point during these weeks that I don’t know my own age as readily as a person is probably supposed to do. I have to think about it longer that I probably should. Is that a bad thing? A plus side is that I’ll be thinking about how I’m twenty-eight and then realize, oh wait, I’m not twenty-eight yet and won’t be for over half of a year and it’s like for a moment I got a free bonus year.

Haiku!

My suicide tooth.
I can break it when I want.
But can it break me?

A few weeks back there was a night when I only three hours of sleep (actually there have been several like that since my last post, but I’m talking of a specific one). The thing is, the dream I had felt like it took at least three hours if not longer. I understand the thing about dreaming actually taking place in a shorter amount of time than it feels, but it really felt like I’d been dreaming longer than I’d been asleep. Anyway, the dream was about me conducting job interviews for some position that doesn’t exist in reality at some business that doesn’t exist in reality. I apparently had two openings and four applicants (three women, one man). Over the course of the interviews it occurred to me that the man was a complete moron and that I’d two of the women would be getting the jobs and I was starting to get worried that people would talk about me filling the business with just women (you know, like “Look at PDR over there building himself a little harem…”) and I was spent a great deal of time trying to figure out how to do it tactfully. It wasn’t easy considering I had been conducting the interviews in a crowded cafeteria with each of the applicants sitting at a different crowded table but totally able to hear the other interviews. At any rate, I managed to awake before I actually had to do anything. For the record, the third woman who was interviewed was also a moron.

Also for the record, outside of the dream, my harem is totally hiring.

I was going to do some commentary on Christmas as well while I was here, but this is long enough and why waste the content of a post I could do “tomorrow” right?

So, what is the deal with high-heeled shoes anyway? Were I a woman, I’d be all like “These are stupid.” Would the world really be at all worse off if there weren’t high heels any more? Would they be that greatly missed? I suppose that if they did fade out of the mainstream usage, there’d be those who like them for nostalgic value, but they really seem kinda useless to me.

And then there’s neckties. What the chunks are those about?

Geez. I’ve neglected to put anything here for too long. Let’s just see…

I saw some graffiti the other day that read “Chicken Over Bitches” and gave no other details on what that might be. I see a handful of possibilities. There’s the possibility that it could be about a guy who likes his to eat chicken more than he likes to be in the company of women. There’s also the fact that another word for “chicken” is another word for “penis” so it could be kind of a “Homies Over Hoes”-style statement in favor of homosexuality. It would also be nice to think that maybe someone would be kind enough to actually not be using bitches to refer to women. It could be about actual dogs. That means it could be a guy who advocates eating chicken instead of eating dog. I’d get behind that. Also, it could be using the word “over” in terms of literal position and thus maybe the chickens are flying over the dogs, or even riding them like horses or something. That’d be cool. I guess “chicken” could also be people who are scared of stuff. Yeah…

“Do the Homie! Do the Homie!”

Also, a few days back, Saturday morning I guess I left work on foot and got to walk through the wilderness between the Middle Of Nowhere that I am employed within and the city of Halifax. I got to see a rabbit walking around and a duck with three babies swimming behind it.

And just to continue commenting on what I’ve seen, I shall look out the window and tell you of whatever is out there… Wow. Interestingly enough two vehicles in the morning traffic seem to have had a minor accident. They appear to be doing well enough. Looking at the damage and such. That means I get to call them suckers. Excellent. Suckers.