10) It would benefit the economy. Creating jobs is a popular sentiment. And PDR’s Butler is a job.
9) Since I do not feel I am myself better than servants, we would have a strong bond of equality between us. This means the butler would enjoy serving me as much as I enjoy being served.
8) It would be educational. I would learn more about butlers. And that would benefit everyone, probably.
7) It would expand my horizons. The butler could introduce me to new kinds of cookies that he knows that I’ve never tried.
6) If I had a butler, people would think I am better off than I actually am and that would lead them to treat me as if I were a rich dude. That would make it much easier for me to become rich.
5) He would be able to give me more reasons to have a butler. Butlers know all about reasons to have butlers.
4) Butlers have connections. A butler could hook me up with a chauffeur and a chef and a maid and so on.
3) I could talk to him about Brontosaurs. Butlers love that!
2) It would prevent terrorists from saying I don’t have a butler. We’re supposed to be opposing the terrorists right?
1) I’m incompetent at most tasks. If I had a butler to do these tasks, he would do those tasks better than I do and therefore the world would be a better place.

So, if any governments want to pitch in and pay for someone to be my butler, let me know.

In other news, I found the note I left for myself that March 25th is International Robot Day according to me. I totally forgot to celebrate it this year. This will not happen again.

I read something in the paper the other day about a laser cannon that can be mounted on boats and set enemy boats’ engines on fire. This is to be used as a deterrent for pirates. We are using lasers to fight pirates. We are a step closer to being in a 21st Century of which I can approve.

Haiku!

Darn that Cosmonaut!
He stole my pepper shaker!
I was using that!

I do not have much else worth mentioning today. I’ll just leave you with a thought:If we’re so worried about the polar ice caps melting, why don’t we just surround the arctic with a bunch of refrigerators, open them all up and cool the whole place down! Problem saved!

I got your Three Pages of Secret Government Robots right here, sucker!

Ghosts and Robots: Both are easier to draw than actual people.

And somehow a Phone Guys strip got here too:

Somehow Pete has never cared about being correct, technically or not, until it had a chance to reflect poorly on him. What an idiot.

As I said, I am starting a tradition wherein I will order my year’s supply of when John Swartzwelder’s latest book is released. This year that is the Fifty Foot Detective, which has recently become orderable on Amazon. So I have ordered this latest chapter of Frank Burly absurdity and alongside it some other books including Towing Jehova, (a book which I first heard about in my childhood on Prisoners of Gravity (a Canadian show about sci-fi). but I could never remember what it was called until I realized the Internet could probably tell me) and A Man of the People (For years I thought Chinua Achebe had only written four novels and that I’d read them all, but then it turns out I plumb forgot about this one). I love books and it makes me happy to have some coming my way. Hooray!

I just don’t understand crossdressing. More specifically, I can’t understand why certain clothes would be assigned to certain genders. Why are dresses supposed to be just for women? It seems pretty arbitrary to me.

I guess I’m lucky that my preferred outfit, jeans and a t-shirt, is pretty much standard dude fare and that I am a dude. Thus my outfit lines up with my gender. But what if a dude wants to wear a dress? What if that is what he feels better wearing? Why do people think that’s weird? I can think of no logical reason for it. Except for maybe undergarments that actually conform to the shape of the bits they cover, clothes serves its purpose regardless of which gender it is on, right?

It is nice that for most of a century now women in men’s clothes has pretty much become accepted, but the other way around is still generally ridiculed just because of these rules that are ingrained into society for no good reason.

Anyway, since I apparently assume the Internet is some kind of voting device, I am hereby voting for the erasing of any stigmas that are still involved with crossdressing. Of course doing so would probably kind of ruin it for any people out there who get a thrill out of the “naughtiness” of dressing in clothes that aren’t “supposed” to go with their gender, but I’m sure they’ll figure out something to replace it with. My vote is for the people who just want to dress in what they like.