It’s like this: I make a year’s worth of Phone Guys at a time, then assign them numbers and bust them out once a week. Last week’s was #137 and I noticed that I had mistakenly skipped #138. I wondered why that could be, and I realized that Pete must not have made his traditional Monday call this week. All I had to do was find out why.

Demonoclast

Joann Hanlon is employed by the government, but they don’t admit it. Joann Hanlon destroys demons. Her work is necessary, but, the government says, if word got out about the existence of otherworldly evil creatures there would be panic in the streets. Luckily for everyone, Joann Hanlon is extremely good at her job. When any kind of demonic invasion is discovered, the Demonoclast is sent in things are cleared up quickly.

This was one of those cases where I just drew and saw what came out. I got the gloves and the boots and I thought “She looks like she does hard work. What’s hard work in superheroing?” And eventually I decided that cleaning up demon infestations would have to be near the top of that field. I drew that little sigil on her chest, somewhat inspired by the little ghost monster face on Dr. Strange’s costume (though a lot of the time that is just drawn as a generic shape these days).

Also, the name “Demonoclast” which means “Destroyer of Demons” appears nowhere according to Google, so I’m pretty happy about that.

Vanquisher

Vic Decker was a baseball player until he was paralyzed in a car accident that he had caused. While he spiraled into depression for a time, he eventually found a place in the world as a public crusader, trying to improve his hometown with various social causes. But this brought him into contact with a local crimeboss, who didn’t want some gimp celebrity interfering with his business. The crimeboss sent a hitman to take out Decker, but things did not go as planned. During the attack an experimental energy device that Decker had been investing in exploded and bathed him in bizarre energies that not only caused his body to heal its wounds, but raised him to new superhuman levels. Super strong, nearly invulnerable, fast and agile, Vic Decker became the Vanquisher to face off against those who use violence to stand in the way of social progress.

You’ll note that none of that description addresses the way Vanquisher dresses. That is on purpose. Vanquisher dresses in clothes that he finds comfortable and that’s that. As I’ve said in the past, I have no personal belief that society’s conception of what constitutes manly or feminine clothing is an absolute truth, so I’m willing to let Vanquisher dress as he pleases and not depict him as being weak because of it. I can assure you that if I were better at drawing, that outfit would be much lacier.

A is for Ape Submarines
B is for Brains
C is for Crows
D is for Dog Friends
E is for Eerie Pianists
F is for French Toast
G is for Giraffe Ossicones
H is for Helium in a Bucket
I is for Invisible Windows
J is for Jewish People
K is for Koala Parades
L is for Laughing Jewish People
M is for Medieval Science-Kings
N is for New Old Men
O is for Old Old Men
P is for PDR
Q is for Quests for Magical Artifacts
R is for Robot Jewish People
S is for Salted Pretzel Thieves
T is for Troubled Youths
U is for Unimportant Bureaucratic Positions
V is for Viking-related Boats
W is for Worldwide Conspiracies Involving Statuesque Clowns
X is for Xebecs Piloted by Old Men
Y is for Yellow Xylophones
Z is for Zinc Tubes

I wrote an exam tonight. Only three left. I’m sure I’ve already said this, but I don’t like exams. They’re my least favorite part of school, and they’re all I gots left. One thing, though, I think that my chronic procrastination during the school year has made me a little better of whipping together an essay on the spot during an exam. I’m not saying I did particularly well (I need more than an hour to write a decent essay), but I did better than I might have without a year of procrastinatory practice.

Anyway, a new thing to add to my list of things I’d do if I were rich: Take classes at university and just not show up to the exams because I don’t even care because I’m rich.

Haiku!

The king has been born.
Long live the king! Three years pass:
The king is a jerk.

In other news, I have watched Game of Thrones. I watched it. Are you happy now society? I said I’d watch it and I did. Now I only have about a million other super hit shows that I am supposed to catch up on.

In other other news, it is snowing outside. What the chunks! Stop that!

In still other other news, my apartment building has this chute by the elevator down which we are to dump garbage bags. Recyclables and compost and stuff goes down to the basement, but garbage bags go down the chute. It is pretty conventient. But as of Monday that chute will no longer be in use. The garbage has to go down to the basement too. It’s not really that inconvenient, I still don’t have to worry about “garbage day” like some chump homeowner, but I will miss the chute.

With schooltimes relaxing, I was able to produce a standalone comic:

Also, we’ve always got Phone Guys: