I’ve recently come into possession of a series of letters sent home by a Pvt. Georgie Mando over the course of his two-year stint in the European Theatre of World War Two. First, some details about Georgie: Georgie Mando was born in Halifax, Nova Scotia. He was eighteen years old when he enlisted to fight […]
I feel like I should be commenting on recent events in the world. There was this big wedding in England that everyone cared about and then forgot once Osama bin Laden got killed and also some kind of election in that country that borders the Nation of Patrick D Ryall on all sides.
On the former, I have to say that PDR is just not a big fan of weddings. I like the idea of marriages, but the whole big wedding to start them generally just annoys me. Now, I’ve had a good time at some wedding receptions, certainly, but the ritual, the ceremony, is usually boring to me. So seeing this blown up to royal levels in England, and then covered with fervor by the local newses (I only get one news channel, people. I need variety or I miss out on everything) made it even worse.
The night before the wedding we put a flyer into the newspaper at which I work that advertised plates with an image of Prince Whichever and his ladyfriend who were getting married. If even one person saw that flyer and thought “Oh, that looks nice, I should get that,” then I apologize for not sabotaging it before it could get to you. That plate was a waste of your money.
Similarly dominating the news, and more likely to have actual effects on the world I think, is the death of the most wanted terrorist. Perhaps my favorite aspect of this whole thing was a small blurb that was in last night’s paper that, if I may paraphrase from memory, went something like “some construction worker who had flown to Afghanistan to find bin Laden himself claims that his presence scared the terrorist leader out of the mountains to the city where he was found. The construction worker now wants millions of dollars for his services.” Possibly there is more legitimacy to the guy’s claim than the small article went into, but I would like to make it clear that my presence in this apartment totally kept Osama from being here. I’d be happy to settle for just a single million.
Haiku!
Rocketship captain.
Please don’t forget your loved ones
as you soar through space.
As for the Canadian election: Pretty much nobody I know was happy with the result so… sucks for pretty much everybody I know. But rest assured, the leadership of the Nation of PDR remains dedicated to maintaining peaceful relations with Canada while simultaneously trying to bring down the current form of society as a whole.
That’s it. Go away.
The SecGov Robot Army Cadets finally stop talking to ghosts and get moving again:
After like a dozen pages in a blank grey void, now I have to start doing backgrounds again. But you know who have no problem existing in a single-color void? The Phone Guys:
Robexor’s mighty robotic fist smashed through the wall of the elementary school. Children screamed as the giant robot, over ten feet tall, stooped to stick his head into their classroom and, with a voice amplified by deafening megaspeakers, shouted “Go to your gymnasium for an assembly!” Little Butch Darby wet himself and tried to run, […]
Argh. My ear hurts again. This makes for the third such earache in as many years. Last time, it was the right ear. Now we’re the left ear this time, which is where we were two times ago. I don’t even get why it is happening. It felt fine as I was trying to get to sleep, but upon waking up, there it was, painfulness in the ear when I swallow or, for whatever reason, happen to press on my ear. And this time it doesn’t feel like there’s a big mass of pressure built up in the ear fluid or anything. This time it is just the painfulness. This leads me to believe that this is technically a different problem than the last two times, but the end result, the ear pain, remains intact. I can’t help but wonder if I didn’t, in my sleep, somehow scratch the inside of my ear. And if I did that, sleeptimes-PDR needs to wise up.
Why is it that I could have a pain in my hand or foot or something and not mind all that much, but once it is in one of my ears it occupies my every waking thought? Ear canals. More trouble than they’re worth? Someone needs to look into this.
Also, my spellcheck tells me that painfulness is a legitimate word. Sounds pretty clumsy to me. There are definitely easier ways to phrase a sentence than to use the word painfulness. But that is what makes English so fun.
