Okay, so, the first SecGov page to be put up in the new fashion is up there. For now I’m thinking that I’ll be scheduling SecGovs to go up on Tuesdays and Thursdays and then we’ll see how that works. Still a work in progress all this, but we’re doing our best. Or at least our not worst.

Anyway, here’s a story:

Dr. Skeet Bonzo studied asteroids. But one day, through no fault of his own, just pure dumb chance, one of the asteroids he studied crashed into Skeet’s car. Skeet, who had been in an appliance store when the car had been destroyed, recognized the asteroid even after the impact. “Why, that’s BF2990P” he exclaimed as saw the wreckage. And then he realized something that sent a shiver down his spine: That asteroid’s designation was the same as the license plate number of the car it had just destroyed. “I never noticed that one of the asteroids had the same number as my license plate because I dealt with so many asteroids,” he said to some kid who had wandered to see the damage up but didn’t actually care what Skeet had to say. Skeet, for a moment, was so amazed by the coincidence that he was dumbstuck. “The odds of that asteroid hitting that car were astronomical! I can’t believe that it happened!” but Skeet fought off thoughts he considered unscientific by rationalizing it, noting that the asteroid’s designation existed only as a thing given to it by the scientists, and was not an actual property of the asteroid itself. And besides, given the vast amount of time for coincidences to occur in, they are more likely to. Anyway, because his car had been crushed, Skeet had to walk home carrying the microwave he had just bought. On the way he was mugged and shot. The mugger ran away and, as he lay dying, Skeet happened to notice that the serial number on the microwave was “BF2990P”. With that, Skeet said “Well, that’s just stupid. I’m glad to be getting out of here” and died. Skeet’s fellow scientists decided to pay their respects to Skeet by naming an asteroid after him. A year later that very asteroid came crashing to Earth, hitting an apartment building and destroying one apartment. What apartment? Specifically apartment number BF2990P. And the resident of that apartment who was killed at that time? The very criminal who had killed Skeet and who, by sheer coincidence alone had also been named Skeet Bonzo. Suffice it to say, when they met up as ghosts they all had a good laugh.

Anyway, that’s it for today. I gotta go. In the meantime, I wonder what would be involved, legally, in arranging to get my skull encased in amber when I’m dead…

Now, I’m only giving you Phone Guys today, but that is because we’re changing how we do things. The SecGov comics will now be appearing more than once a week and Mondays will be for other comics like Phone Guys, Little Choys and anything else I want. The SecGov stuff will have a permanent place at the top of the page, with posts like this below, like if this was a proper webcomic site. Sure, people might miss out on new posts if they don’t scroll down past the comic, but I can’t help everything, people. Anyway, should be SecGov up tomorrow if all goes well.

Regular viewers of this site will notice that absolutely nothing is different. The menu to the right has always been there and the banner at the top is obviously not a smaller and more colorful replacement for an older banner. And there sure aren’t another other changes both cosmetic and functional designed to bring the Book of PDR into the new year all fancy and new. But somehow I still feel like thanking Marq for it.

In other news, while I wrote this I ate a pita bread with peanut butter and banana slices on it and I’m pretty sure that combination should be called a PDRPBBNP in the future. (Obviously that stands for PDR Peanut Butter, Banana ’n Pita. I’m not spelling it out to imply anyone is stupid, but I figure someday aliens will read this and I want them to have proper context.)

So, I’ve got this big cookie that was wrapped in saran-wrap style stuff when I got it, right? So I eat about half of it and try to wrap the remains up for tomorrow and the wrap doesn’t fit anymore. What the chunks is up with that? There’s less cookie for it to cover now than it did a few minutes ago and it can’t make it. Sometimes the world just doesn’t make sense. I’m assuming this has to do with aliens somehow.

Haiku!

Damage the balloon!
We have to cause it some harm
or it will harm us.

Marq ain’t got no Internet. Sometimes things are downright inconvenient. Still, from what I understand Marq’s updating of This Very Website is coming along well and it shouldn’t be long before we’ve got a new design and hopefully a new method of displaying the comics and stuff. Certainly my current method of big pages with all the images isn’t the nicest mode. While 2011 has certainly been my most productive year on my Book of PDR, I’m hoping 2012 could continue the trend.

Also, I ain’t got no money. It’s kind of annoying. It makes buying things more difficult, that’s for sure. I think, realistically, I’m going to have to move to a cheaper apartment in the new year. That sucks. I’ve been here for, like, seven or eight years. Sure, a two bedroom is more than I need, but I’m attached to it. Plus, moving is a pain in the neck. But that’s the price I guess I have to pay for not having money. Because not having money proves that I don’t deserve my apartment.

UPDATE: Like half an hour later. So anyway, as anyone who knows me well can attest, I have serious neuroses about food going bad. Because that thin layer of saran wrap couldn’t contain that cookie I felt like I had to eat it all now and now I’m all like “ooooogghhh, I feel gross and cookie-filled” and now I also don’t have any cookie for tomorrow. It’s not easy being PDR

As mentioned many times before, an annoying amount of spam comments are thrown at this website. Well, they’ve got a new trick now. The spamming robots have learned to tailor the fake comments to the title of the post being commented on. For example on the post called Stupid Over Hurricanes the comment said “Stupid over hurricanes.. He-he-he :)” and on Rolling With Dogs the comment read “Rolling with dogs.. Corking :)”

All of these comments have been made under the name “www.bookofpdr.com” which does make it pretty obvious that these are not really random people enjoying my site. But since robots have used the word “corking” on my site far more often than people have, I was almost reluctant to delete them.