Bella Harrison

Bella Harrison is an enlightened old black woman who offers wise spiritual advice to white people who are having problems. It happens all the time. Some white person is losing confidence before the big game, or a married white couple is drifting apart, or some white detective just can’t seem to pull together the necessary clues to solve the case. One conversation with Bella and her down-to-earth wisdom helps to turn everything around.

But this skill has not gone unnoticed. People in power have caught on that Bella always seems to know what to do. A secret government task force was formed. At first they just monitored as she advised white people, but then they tried to go undercover and solicit advice for a made-up problem. Bella saw right through the ruse and fled. Now Bella is on the lam, always one step ahead of the task force that wants to know her secrets, even if it means bringing her in and dissecting her brain.

The Magical Negro is, of course, a patronizing attempt at white people who make movies to create black characters who are so great that the people who make the movies can’t possibly be racist. Instead of creating black characters who were realistically human, they did this. Naturally I needed to get onto that bandwagon and make it weird.

Bunnra the Mighty

Bunnra was, for a time, just an ordinary rabbit used in ordinary magic acts. She would “vanish” into a hat or “appear” from a sleeve. It was a good enough gig for a rabbit, she supposed, but it didn’t last. One day, the magician who owned her bought a used hat that he thought would add a touch of flair to his act. What he didn’t realize was that this hat was actually once the property of a genuine wizard. If he’d placed it on his head he would have been instructed in all manner of mystical arts, but before he did so, he wanted to make sure Bunnra would fit, and so it was that she was the one who was privy to the secrets of the cosmos. Soon being in a magic act is not enough for her and she returns to the woods to be back with her own kind, as a magical rabbit queen!

I started a tradition when I got rabbit-themed Superheroes and a rabbit-themed Supervillain into previous Super Sunday years. Had to keep it going. I think she and her realm of rabbits would have to meet the Horribloid.

Gujjer

On the alien world Thrensa the most intelligent species is one for whom technology has not advanced very far. The Thrensans, as they are known, are nomadic beings who run on the vast plains of the world not unlike Earth’s antelopes. Gujjer is the leader of her tribe, having risen to dominance with her mystical knowledge. Being bonded to the spirits of her ancestors, Gujjer can get visions from the sky that allow her to predict the weather and judge where best to bring the group. But will even this knowledge help Gujjer to save her tribe when the undead start to rise and eat the flesh of living Thrensans? Gujjer and friends are going to have to find out.

I had done all kinds of alien wizards this year, but they were all Wallfixers. Obviously I had to remedy that by making an alien wizard unaligned to them. I am clearly doing important work here.

The Cabinet of Crime

There was a crimeboss wizard who, as wizards sometimes do, surrounded himself with animated objects to do his work for him. Among them was a walking talking cabinet that wanted more. After only a short time serving his “master”, the Cabinet strangled the wizard to death and took over the crime syndicate. Ruling from the shadows, the Cabinet has become a criminal mastermind, owing to the fact that any books or maps or files he keeps in his drawers, he automatically knows the information they contain. This makes planning jobs and running operations second nature to him. It also means that, once you’ve gotten into his bad books, he won’t forget you.

I thought it would be amusing if some hero was chasing after clues to find out who the Cabinet of Crime was, thinking it was an organizational body, and then this guy turned up. It’s so stupid, it appeals to me greatly. Of course, since I’ve blown the twist here, I can’t do it now. I’m sure we all agree that’s for the best.