Doom Punch

There is a group called the Weird Assassins. One of them, however reluctantly, is Doom Punch, also known as Rick Ramsay.

Rick was never really a good man, but he wasn’t a wholly bad one either. He’d had his troubles with the police, but the crime that he was sent to prison for, a double homicide, was one that he had not been guilty of. He’d just been the wrong color in the wrong place at the wrong time. He was convicted and sentenced to life behind bars. Whether it was a lucky break or not is impossible to say, but the warden of the prison was the type to conduct strange occult experiments. Seeking a volunteer, the warden offered Rick preferential treatment if he agreed to be his test subject.

Long story short: Rick wound up with a magic hand replacing his own that could kill at a touch. Instead of being nicer to Rick, the warden attempted to have him killed, so Rick escaped. Living in a world with superheroes, Rick made the understandable jump to trying to make a living as a bounty hunter. But it is not easy for a wanted man with a death-touch to keep on the straight and narrow path. He needed money, and eventually realized that killing could be the easiest way to earn a living. In the end, he’d become not only a killer, but a killer much worse than the one he’d originally been accused of being.

Claire Lincoln

Claire is a member of the same demon-plagued family we met with her cousin Natalie Lincoln. To reiterate: a demon cursed this family line so they would be attacked by all sorts of monsters and mystics, but rather than die off, the clan has grown especially skilled at fighting supernatural forces.

In her lifetime of fending off those forces, Claire has picked up some intense fighting skills, along with a particularly study bo staff made of strange mystical wood. That sort of thing is common in her family, which is why so many of them wind up either as monster hunters or paranormal investigators or other similar occupations. But Claire has always wanted to be a teacher. That seemed like an impossible dream for someone who is at constant risk of being attacked by weird enemies, the kids would be in danger at all times. But what if the kids were already in danger? Recently Claire has been given the opportunity to teach and train a class of children who are, like her, likely targets for mystical foes. The children of wizards and demons and mad scientists need to get educated somewhere, and why shouldn’t Claire be the one who teaches them? Claire is very interested in taking the job, but she can’t help but wonder who the secret individual bankrolling this strange school could be.

Stories about a class made of weird kids with powers and stuff are practically overdone. So I wanted to do it too, obviously!

Today’s beekeeper appeared in an episode of Mission Impossible titled “Zubrovnik’s Ghost”. First, let’s have a quick summary of the episode: Some enemy agents are trying to convince someone to defect to their side by telling her that her husband’s ghost wants her to. That’s a lie, though. Her husband, the titular Dr. Zubrovnik, wasn’t even dead for real. For the purposes of this ruse, the bad guys killed a beekeeper and burned his body to pass it off as Zubrovnik. That was a mistake. The beekeeper’s ghost takes its violent revenge on his killers, and the agents that Mission Impossible sent (I’m not going to bother learning which organization stars in the show) get to stand around wondering why this show isn’t about beekeeper ghosts every week.

We never get to see this beekeeper alive, or even learn his name. He’s an unfortunate victim of a murder before the episode even begins, which suggests he may not be the best fighter, but from his position in the afterlife, he displays some real power.

The first suggestion that things are not as they seem is that the bees around Zubrovnik’s mansion are active at night, and even during thunderstorms. Of course, they also wind up swarming the murderers, so it is pretty clear they’re doing the dead beekeeper’s bidding. The ghostly apiarist also displays control over smoke, another standard supernatural beekeeper weapon. Furthermore, his ability to shut and lock doors from beyond the grave should be mentioned. Sure, that’s more Ghost Power than Beekeeper Power, but it is his Beekeeper Rage that brings him back from the grave in the first place.

We do have to address that Beekeeper Rage, though. Now, I’m not going to say getting murdered is something one shouldn’t get a little ticked off about, but as is so often the case, Beekeeper Rage goes above and beyond rational anger. Mission Impossible’s psychic agent tries to contact Zubrovnik’s ghost, but instead find’s the beekeeper, whom she describes as having “unquenchable power”. “It hates,” she says. “It hates!” The beekeeper is using his ghostness to strike out at some bad guys, so I can’t say he isn’t using it in a productive way, but it sure seems to have completely overwhelmed his humanity. Hopefully once the murderers are dead he can find some peace.

It is my understanding, from Internet research, that the Mission Impossible franchise has maintained a continuity that goes all the way to the movies that still come out to this day, rather than having been rebooted like so many franchises. I also understand that the truly supernatural events in this episode are not in keeping with the general tone of Mission Impossible. Since this is supernatural beekeeper exists in a world where that sort of thing is not common, it is actually more impressive that he has these powers.

Three Honeycombs out of Five.