Various things of great galactic importance keep happening to the small crew of a quarantine station in the Epabrian Galactic Empire.

Calvin Brooks

Calvin always wanted to be the captain of an Epabrian Starship. After decades of hard work, he is now in command of the Quarantine Station #347, a job which is not at all equal to the rank of captain. It’s closer to sergeant, but without the respect of those below him. The station’s purpose is to quarantine the ships and the crews of those passing into Epabrian space, which does get Calvin close to those with real political power, and he can’t quite stop himself from trying to manipulate things in ways that he think will raise his esteem, but which always seem fail.

Kelly Durnwell

Second in command on the station is Kelly Durnwell, who joined the Epabrian military for the medical plan and is happy to not be doing anything harder than she is. Her one and only goal is to get through her career to the retirement age without anything going wrong, so she always gets a little nervous about Calvin’s plans, but he can easily manipulate her with bonuses and vacation time.

Viderin Nont

The Epabrian Empire is a human civilization, but they have citizens from other species in there as well. Viderin is Owds Person, a refugee from a planet ruled by a despot. Viderin has customs that are different from humanity’s, and she doesn’t correctly understand human customs, and therefore she’s the stations resident Wacky Foreigner.

Zhick Naya

Zhick, unlike Viderin, is indeed a human. There is a planet in the Epabrian Empire in which humans have evolved blue skin. Zhick got assigned to the 347 after he pissed off his captain on the Starship where he was first assigned. He joined up to get away from a bad relationship and has no loyalty to the Empire. He’s correctly noted that the rest of the crew is more than enough to keep things running smoothly, so he shovels whatever work he is assigned onto Viderin and spends his time pulling cons on passers-through.

Roberick XB

Roberick XB is the kind of representative of foreign powers that often pass through the quarantine station. The head of a Robot Shipping Lines vessel, Roberick comes through 347 every month or two and is a source of gossip (usually lies), and of smuggled goods (cheap and sometime stolen).

The Epabrian Empire was first seen in a little comic I did called Starship Renewal and I felt like it was time to go back to that well.

One of the big influences here is Red Dwarf, obviously, but there are many other sci-fi sitcoms that have not lasted as long. This would be one of those.

Terra-Man is a pretty minor villain from the Superman franchise, having had his heyday in the 70s, but he deserves more. Classic Terra-Man is like this: Tobias Manning was the son of an outlaw in the wild west. When that outlaw died, Toby was abducted by an outlaw alien. Raised in space, Tobias made a name for himself as a notorious criminal across the galaxy armed with powerful alien technology and a western theme. At some point in the 80s or 90s, I guess the writers forgot how awesome the idea of a Wild West Outlaw From Space is, so they reintroduced Terra-Man as an eco-terrorist. Maybe there’s a case to be made for adding an eco-terrorist to Superman’s villain cast, but not at the expense of the cool Wild West Outlaw From Space! Luckily, there have been a few minor cameos of Terra-Man in more recent years that tend toward the Wild West version, so I think things are in the process of correcting.

I admit that there’s not really a shortage of Opposite Supermans in the villain cast. You’ve got your Bizarros and your Kryptonian criminals and your Nuclear Men and so on, but at least Terra-Man comes at it from a different angle. Clark is an alien who came from space and gained powers he uses to help humanity, Toby is a human who went to space and gained powers that he uses selfishly. It’s a perfect contrast. To top it off you could use his to represent a kind of old-school masculinity that Clark doesn’t. All while riding a flying horse!

I don’t have much more to say today. If we say that Terra-Man is currently a C-List Superman villain, I see no reason why he couldn’t be an A-Lister. He just needs the exposure.

An albino pigeon, sick of the city life, goes to the wilderness to try to find a better way. And it sucks and he makes a mess of it every time.

City Bird

City Bird is the only recurring character on this show. He’s a boorish jerk who just wants everything to go his way with no personal effort. So, having moved out of the city (both because he was getting sick of that life, and because he’d burned a lot of bridges with the pigeons there) he is now trying out “simpler” life in the woods. One week he’ll try living with some raccoons, the week after he mooches off some moose, and so on. He’d also have to learn to avoid predators, with only his city wits to get him through.

I feel like this is a terrible idea that could still somehow produce a show that would amuse me.

Let’s say the wilderness City Bird is wandering is the same one that the Horribloid is in. Why not?