Okay, so today (or Wednesday anyway. For me this is still my Wednesday waking period, even though it is after midnight) a bunch of websites shut themselves off in protest or whatever. Obviously I didn’t do that for the Book of PDR, for various reasons including the fact I wouldn’t know how. Also including the fact that since nobody much really comes here, so nobody would notice. But the main important super serious reason is this: I’m a radical anti-capitalist who pretty much endorses all forms of copyright infringement and piracy or movies, music, and software. I want it mandatory and taught in preschools until everyone has no money ever. So obviously I’m the exact kind of enemy the SOPA bill wants to destroy. Therefore the reasonable people who want the bill defeated but aren’t actually insane would be better off not associating with me. Right? I’d damage their credibility.

(Actually, I don’t think there’s much copyright infringement on my site. The Canadian Heritage Moments, maybe would count? I’m sure there’s a picture of Batman on here somewhere? But mostly I’ve preferred to keep things PDR-related (probably to our detriment).)

Anyway, that’s not the real reason I’m doing this post. At some point I made a promise to use this side to record all my encounters with police officers, so now I’ve got to do that. Unfortunately, though, this one isn’t me being suspicious in any way. Basically I just got home from work and found a situation in the lobby of my building (it isn’t important the details because it involves people I don’t know) and even though everything seemed to be in hand with 911 already called and such, I didn’t want to leave until I was sure everything worked out so I wound up holding the door for the three cops and two paramedics who showed up. That’s pretty much the extent of it.

But here’s what I took from it: All those cops looked younger than me. What The Chunks Is That About?

Okay, I don’t have to be in work as early as usual today, so I’ve got some time, let’s see what I can post about.

Earlier this month, Loius C. K. put out his most recent comedy special exclusively online skipping the whole television network thing. Even though I can’t even so much afford things really these days he’s only asking five bucks (American, I assume, but didn’t notice), so I figured it was probably possible for me to spend five bucks without it killing me (the jury is still out though). Anyway, I got the special and now I’m talking about it on my website. He remains to entertain me. Any comedy show that begins with pointing out that the audience is a large enough sampling of people that someone there is bound to be dead by the holidays is up my alley. I’m giving it Four out of Six Pieces of PDR’s Reviewing System Cake. It’s not the best of his specials that I have seen, but it is still great. And it is cheap. Keep that in mind anyone wanting some entertainment.

Haiku!

The owl was not there.
But then, who was saying “Hoo”?
And where was the owl?

Apart from that, not much else is going on. As I say, I am soon going to work. I spent much of today trying to work on things I’d like to get done before the New Year rolls around (so it looks like I got more done this year). Mostly I’m trying to finish the Hover Head story I mentioned I’d be starting around this time last year. I did indeed start it in the early bits of 2011, but then my focus shifted more to the SecGov Robots and I let this one drag out. Either way, it shall be done by Monday I am certain, and then I won’t have to worry about it any more. And all of you may continue not caring.

Anyway, not I have to get ready to go to work.

So, I’ve got this big cookie that was wrapped in saran-wrap style stuff when I got it, right? So I eat about half of it and try to wrap the remains up for tomorrow and the wrap doesn’t fit anymore. What the chunks is up with that? There’s less cookie for it to cover now than it did a few minutes ago and it can’t make it. Sometimes the world just doesn’t make sense. I’m assuming this has to do with aliens somehow.

Haiku!

Damage the balloon!
We have to cause it some harm
or it will harm us.

Marq ain’t got no Internet. Sometimes things are downright inconvenient. Still, from what I understand Marq’s updating of This Very Website is coming along well and it shouldn’t be long before we’ve got a new design and hopefully a new method of displaying the comics and stuff. Certainly my current method of big pages with all the images isn’t the nicest mode. While 2011 has certainly been my most productive year on my Book of PDR, I’m hoping 2012 could continue the trend.

Also, I ain’t got no money. It’s kind of annoying. It makes buying things more difficult, that’s for sure. I think, realistically, I’m going to have to move to a cheaper apartment in the new year. That sucks. I’ve been here for, like, seven or eight years. Sure, a two bedroom is more than I need, but I’m attached to it. Plus, moving is a pain in the neck. But that’s the price I guess I have to pay for not having money. Because not having money proves that I don’t deserve my apartment.

UPDATE: Like half an hour later. So anyway, as anyone who knows me well can attest, I have serious neuroses about food going bad. Because that thin layer of saran wrap couldn’t contain that cookie I felt like I had to eat it all now and now I’m all like “ooooogghhh, I feel gross and cookie-filled” and now I also don’t have any cookie for tomorrow. It’s not easy being PDR

Okay, I’m sure I’ve mentioned it somewhere on here, but I’m too tired to be bothered checking so I’ll just say it anew: From the 30th of this month until the 6th of the next, PDR is going to be in the New York, New York, the city so nice, they named it!

I’m similarly confident that I’ve mentioned before: I’m broke. I haven’t so much got money as I have credit cards. And after this trip, even those will be maxed out. So that’s not good. When I get back, I won’t even have room to go further into debt.

So why am I taking the trip? Well it’s a gift, so it isn’t a stupid thing to do. So how did I make it a stupid thing to do? Well, since I wasn’t paying for the trip, I decided that I’d go longer than usual (a full week) and then I’m paying for more hotel and thus I’ve driven up my price. You see?

One downside to this trip that already occurred: I did not manage to get tickets to the Daily Show or Colbert. They were both off the table before the trip was even booked. I never had a chance. But then, out of nowhere, I found out that Conan O’Brien just happened to be doing shows in New York the very week I’m going to be there! Hot dang, I thought as I went to their website to get me some tickets. Except apparently they do this thing where you put your name on the list and you may or may not be given the tickets. Like a lottery. Anyway, I did not get tickets. So there goes that. My several ideas for free entertainment didn’t work out. I’ve got some spending money, but I’m still gonna be on the lookout for cheapness next week.

Nonetheless I look forward to being back in the city where probably I should live. When I get back I plan on doing some real work on getting myself back into financial non-ruin. My goal is that in half a year I should be in a state where I can call myself not poor. So lets see how that works out.

Anyway, I’m not one of those people with good technology, so probably I’m not gonna be posting much next week. Oh well. I’m sure all of you can survive without me guiding you through the Internet for that brief amount of time. If anything important happens, like if I get to pet a dog, I’ll let you know when I get back.

I think I might have a superhuman ability to lose nail clippers. I even wrote a post about it a few hours ago including a haiku about how I can’t find them even though I own two pairs. But then I lost that post too. Superhuman, see?

I will not attempt to recreate the haiku, I am afraid. I could never recapture the moment and to attempt would just cheapen us all.

In other news, as my Halloween-time trip to NYC approaches, it becomes ever more apparent how much money I don’t have. I’m not going to not take the trip, obviously. But I am going to be suffering afterward (and a bit beforeward if I want to have money to spend…).

Such is the way of things.

I was just browsing the Onion, as is my wont, and I got a message saying I’d used up my monthly allowance of five pages and that I had to subscribe to keep reading. Naturally, with this being the Onion, I assumed it was kidding, but no. Apparently non-American readers are now being expected to pay for seeing the Onion website.

Now, don’t get me wrong, as a loyal fan of the Onion for more than a decade I am willing to pay them for entertaining me. The makers of the Onion very much deserve to be paid well for entertaining us every week and I do doubt this is just some greedy whim of theirs, they probably need the additional income because they aren’t making enough off of advertising and stuff. I own six of their books (I own Our Dumb Century twice even) and have many times over the years paid for print editions of the paper, but those are things I can buy when I have the money around. I don’t plan on paying for a subscription to the website so, Onion, I’m afraid I won’t be seeing as much as you anymore. You will be missed.

Half of this Canadian Propaganda Commercial is about a child freezing to death! Canada!

This one depicts a town that has too many sick people and not enough space to save them, right? So they all work together to make a hospital that provides its services for free. That’s nice. Although this Heritage Minute has none of the extreme quotability that I love for things for, it is about one of my favorite things about Canada, the free healthcare. That’s important in a country where kids freeze to death on a regular basis.

I also like the two guys who point out that since they’re the best builders in town, they can build a hospital. Of this, I approve. These aren’t two guys saying “we can build this hospital cheaper than anyone else in town,” because that would be insane. Who would want to live in a society where hospitals, or anything for that matter, was built by the people who can do it the cheapest? But anyway, I think I’m going to try to turn “We built the best barn, so we’ll build the hospital!” into something I can work into discussions. Hey, if I can fit “Oh Sire, until the end of time” into everyday conversation on a regular basis, I can do this.

But because that quote is not yet at the forefront of our culture, I can only give this one Three out of Six Pieces of PDR’s Reviewing System Cake. It’s a rare case where I actually like the thing the Heritage Minute is about more than I like the Heritage Minute itself.

I feel like I should be commenting on recent events in the world. There was this big wedding in England that everyone cared about and then forgot once Osama bin Laden got killed and also some kind of election in that country that borders the Nation of Patrick D Ryall on all sides.

On the former, I have to say that PDR is just not a big fan of weddings. I like the idea of marriages, but the whole big wedding to start them generally just annoys me. Now, I’ve had a good time at some wedding receptions, certainly, but the ritual, the ceremony, is usually boring to me. So seeing this blown up to royal levels in England, and then covered with fervor by the local newses (I only get one news channel, people. I need variety or I miss out on everything) made it even worse.

The night before the wedding we put a flyer into the newspaper at which I work that advertised plates with an image of Prince Whichever and his ladyfriend who were getting married. If even one person saw that flyer and thought “Oh, that looks nice, I should get that,” then I apologize for not sabotaging it before it could get to you. That plate was a waste of your money.

Similarly dominating the news, and more likely to have actual effects on the world I think, is the death of the most wanted terrorist. Perhaps my favorite aspect of this whole thing was a small blurb that was in last night’s paper that, if I may paraphrase from memory, went something like “some construction worker who had flown to Afghanistan to find bin Laden himself claims that his presence scared the terrorist leader out of the mountains to the city where he was found. The construction worker now wants millions of dollars for his services.” Possibly there is more legitimacy to the guy’s claim than the small article went into, but I would like to make it clear that my presence in this apartment totally kept Osama from being here. I’d be happy to settle for just a single million.

Haiku!

Rocketship captain.
Please don’t forget your loved ones
as you soar through space.

As for the Canadian election: Pretty much nobody I know was happy with the result so… sucks for pretty much everybody I know. But rest assured, the leadership of the Nation of PDR remains dedicated to maintaining peaceful relations with Canada while simultaneously trying to bring down the current form of society as a whole.

That’s it. Go away.

10) It would benefit the economy. Creating jobs is a popular sentiment. And PDR’s Butler is a job.
9) Since I do not feel I am myself better than servants, we would have a strong bond of equality between us. This means the butler would enjoy serving me as much as I enjoy being served.
8) It would be educational. I would learn more about butlers. And that would benefit everyone, probably.
7) It would expand my horizons. The butler could introduce me to new kinds of cookies that he knows that I’ve never tried.
6) If I had a butler, people would think I am better off than I actually am and that would lead them to treat me as if I were a rich dude. That would make it much easier for me to become rich.
5) He would be able to give me more reasons to have a butler. Butlers know all about reasons to have butlers.
4) Butlers have connections. A butler could hook me up with a chauffeur and a chef and a maid and so on.
3) I could talk to him about Brontosaurs. Butlers love that!
2) It would prevent terrorists from saying I don’t have a butler. We’re supposed to be opposing the terrorists right?
1) I’m incompetent at most tasks. If I had a butler to do these tasks, he would do those tasks better than I do and therefore the world would be a better place.

So, if any governments want to pitch in and pay for someone to be my butler, let me know.

In other news, I found the note I left for myself that March 25th is International Robot Day according to me. I totally forgot to celebrate it this year. This will not happen again.

I just went roughly two days without the Internet being allowed into my home. Seems I did not have enough money in the bank when the provider tried to take the money out of the bank. A couple times. Like since January. So they cut me off. But it is all taken care of now, so I am back online and I will start making sure that I am keeping more money in my bank account, I think.

It’s weird how if I were to go away for a weekend or something I would not notice the lack of Internet. I mean, it’s only two days. That is really not very long. But when I am in my home and I am having nothing better to do and I have had several days of way-too-long shifts at work this week, when that happens, I notice the lack of Internet. After all. It’s Two Whole Days! That’s forever!

I’m pretty much all caught up on what I missed. I’ve two episodes of each of the Daily Show and Colbert that I am about to watch. And I had to clear about 900 spam comments from the site here. I suppose that could have been worse considering that I’ve had that many turn up in a matter of hours sometimes.