Halloween happened. I wish I could say I’d done something spookier, but it was a decent quiet night all the same. I decided to go as Myself From The Future this year. I sprayed my hair grey and donned a lingering bitterness about the divorce. Apart from that, I was about the same as ever.

In other news, there is a hair on the back of my right hand that is way longer than the others, like thrice the length of the others and it sticks way up. What is that about? Judging by my costume I will apparently have this hair in the future as well, so there is no point in cutting it.

In still other news, I am going to try to participate in the National Novel Writing Month, which of course is right now. I have not bothered registering (when I tried that in the past, I did not write a novel) but I have a secret strategy this time: I am not going to care if the novel is good or not. I am just going to get myself to write one. I guess that is the point of the event to begin with, but last time I wanted something good. Screw that. This time, I am just going to make that amount of words happen. I was already working on an actual novel, but I only rarely get around to bothering with it. I assume that training myself to write more often with a novel I don’t care about will improve the frequency I write the one I care about. Another plus in not registering with them is that when I fail to finish the novel in time I won’t bring down their statistics.

And finally, a general note for those keeping track of my life. We are currently in the middle of the latest seasons of Curb Your Enthusiasm and the Venture Brothers. These are the shows that I find most amusing these days. If anyone out there is looking for something to watch: look for them.

That’s right. I died.

Oh wait. April Fools.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Today I went and got my hair cut. A memory of my youth returned to me. At a haircutting place that I was brought as a child, children were encouraged to, once the cut was over, pick up a bit of their hair from the floor and place it in a little box. You would close the box and the “Hair Fairy” would take your hair and replace it with a cheap toy like you’d get in one of those twenty-five cent vending machines. Obviously the hair just fell into the device (probably into a bag if the people who made it had any sense) and the toy would fall out from some other place which was no doubt a heavenly reservoir of cheap toys and I don’t think that even in my youngest days I believed in the Hair Fairy because the mechanism was so obvious looking. But I believe in the Hair Fairy now. Because someone should.

Maybe I’d get my hair cut a little more often if I still had such awesome reasons to do so.

I admit I am kind of wary of looking up “Hair Fairy” in Google, however. I don’t even want to know where that could lead.

In other news, I took a trip across town to Future Shop today with intent to buy the latest season of the Venture Brothers and use up some of the many Future Shop gift cards I have accumulated over the last few years worth of Christmases and Birthdayses. The bad news is that there was no Venture Brothers season three (or any Venture Bros. at all, it is sad to say) but the good news is that even after a bit of a spending spree I still have eighty-eight dollars worth of gift certified at Future Shop. Not bad.

Haiku!

Captain Amsterdam!
A frog with a heart of gold.
And twice the power.

I have decided that there must be a holiday about index fingers. Perhaps a day when we’re not allowed to use our index fingers for anything, just to remind us how useful such fingers are. And people who have lost their index fingers can speak at big public events. And those foam fingers from sports can be made into decorations for our houses. Someone should get working on that.

So the Dark Lord Char’Nagh has come and ended another year for us and we’re all a little older and a little wiser and a little littler thanks to his visit.

My posting irregularities prevented me from getting around to complaining about Christmas this year, but to be honest my heart wouldn’t have been in it. I’ve gotten to the point where I’m much happier ignoring Christmas than I would be complaining about it. At any rate I made it though all these holidays and now I don’t have to ignore them or complain about them for another year.

2008 was a good year for the PDR, especially in the sense that it was the year that he went from “Never having travelled anywhere” to “I’ve now eaten French Toast in three countries, in two hemispheres.” Let’s see if I can’t add some more travels to 2009.

So anyway, I have rung in the new calendar year with a viewing of both the Bill and Ted movies. I love those guys. I wish they were real. Ah well. Perhaps the future will bring them to me.

Station.

I know I said my next post would be about Christmas, but that can wait. Something more important has arisen. Today I had a fortune cookie which delivered me not one, not two, not three- no wait! It was three. It had three fortunes in it.

• “You communicate a sense of harmony to others.”
• “You have a strong desire for personal freedom.”
• “You have a great deal of energy and self-reliance.”

This can only mean one thing: I am awesome. A cookie said so. Now those of you who had doubts can go become nuns. Especially the males.

I think that is all for now.