Yesterday I checked out the live stream of the show at Adult Swim and happened upon the episode that introduced the “original” Team Venture. That team, analogous to the Silver Age of comics features the likes of Colonel Gentleman, Otto Aquarius, the Action Man, and Kano. Other members of this era’s crew would be introduced in later episodes and they’re all pretty great. The team leader was Dr. Jonas Venture, father of the show’s protagonist Rusty.

Later on in the series we were introduced to the Guild, a Victorian-era group of adventurers including Colonel Lloyd Venture, the grandfather of Jonas. This is all well and good so far.

But if we look at the Venture family tree we see a glaring omission: Women! Well, okay, yes, that is true, but what I actually meant was Lloyd’s son and Jonas’s father. Who is that guy? We have been told that he’s a superscientist like the others, but we have no further details. do I have a prediction: Whatever his name, the missing man is Captain Venture.

The time period of this supposed Captain Venture falls right into World War-era, so he’d probably have a team of heroes similar to the Justice Society and the Invaders who fought the Nazis and terrible caricatures of the Japanese. There’s probably a couple of patriotic-costumed heroes like Captain America and Bucky and maybe powerful female hero who is relegated to the role of secretary as a reference to Wonder Woman. You know, all that sort of thing, but done better than I could do because that’s what the Venture Bros. does.

Furthermore, I would guess that Otto Aquarius joined the Venture clique during this era. The rest of Jonas’s team are great pals, but Otto doesn’t seem to fit in or hang out with them. We also know that Otto ages extremely slowly due to his partially-Atlantean heritage. He’s the team’s equivalent to Namor or Aquaman, so it’d make sense if he came in during the Golden Age and stuck around but never really became friend with the younger generation.

The code “SCP-1256-1” is used by the SCP Foundation to refer to anybody who comes under the influence of a certain strange pamphlet with mind-altering effects, but I am specifically reviewing the family on whose property the mysterious pamphlet was first discovered. We don’t know much about them, but of course that will not stop me. I’ve reviewed more obscure beekeepers than this.

This family of five ran a bee-farm in New South Wales, though I can’t say for sure how successful it was. What we do know is that at some point they came into the possession of a pamphlet titled “Bees – Smarter Than You Think” and at least one member of the family (the eldest daughter) read it pamphlet and fell under its influence.

For whatever reason, this pamphlet makes the reader obsessed with helping bees. Unfortunately this does not make for better beekeepers, because it does it wrong. The afflicted person loses any sense of what actually helps the hive and can actually hurt the hive, to the point that the bees will be fighting against the person who is obsessively trying to help them. In the case of this family, it ended with the daughter murdering the rest of her family. In the long run, this did not help the farm.

This family is (or I should say, was) a beekeeping group in proximity to the supernatural. Often that can be good for these reviews. It did not work out so well in this case, though. They don’t rate so highly.

2 Honeycombs out of Five.

It’s worth noting that the SCP Foundation has devoted a team to containing the pamphlet when it turns up, called Mobile Task Force Zeta-4 but nicknamed the ‘Beekeepers’. But they aren’t actually beekeepers. They’re pamphlet killers whose target pamphlet happens to be about bees.

“I lost so many bees,” said Adam. “I keep losing them.”

Adam was sitting on the roof, watching his hive. Dante sat nearby, nursing an energy drink. Gladys stood by the edge and watched the city.

“If it helps,” said Dante, “we wouldn’t have won without those bees. They died as heroes or whatever.”

“True,” said Adam. “I nearly died.”

“You get used to it,” said Dante.

Adam placed a hand on his bandaged shoulder. “I do not want to die like this.”

“You’re trying to make the world better, Adam? You probably won’t have a choice how you die.”

The helmeted man watched the souvenir shop.

After his scuffle with the woman, he’d seen a flying man attack the shop, get overwhelmed and killed.

Just before sunrise a dark van pulled up. Two workers went inside.

A woman in a suit stood outside the door and watched the street. Metal covered part of her face.

Five minutes later the workers came out with bags that obviously contained the flying man.

They all left.

The helmeted man decided to leave the shop alone for now. It seemed beyond him.

Heading home, he failed to notice the bee that followed him.