I often find myself holding doors for people, and this is especially noticeable now that I’m in school where, if I’m not careful, I can find myself holding the door for my whole class before I even make a conscious effort. This is nothing new. I can remember being in elementary school and holding the door as kids filed in from recess. At that time I kinda wrote it off as having the benefit that I got to be the last one in if I held the door for everyone. Maybe there was some truth to that, but it isn’t like I got a free half hour off of school. I was seconds behind the person ahead of me. And it certainly can’t be the case now, because I have no desire to be the last one to class any more. In university there is no assigned seating and PDR NEEDS to be in his chosen seat. If I don’t get there quickly, someone else could get my spot. But I often still hold the door when other people are around.

Another justification for my door-holding actions has crept into my head lately. I wasn’t looking for an excuse, I just accept door holding as a thing PDRs do, but the excuse appeared in my head anyway. Since I’ve noticed what an amazingly effective means of sickness schools are, it occurred to me that by holding doors, I cut down on the number of people touching the doors, and thus cut down on the number of germs being spread. Now, obviously, the amount of germspread I am preventing is practically nil. These kids touch everything around here. Avoiding one door won’t matter. Te fact that my mind bothered to come up with this made me curious about my door-holding. What is the real reason behind it?

Deep down, I think that I just don’t like the motion that a door makes when it is being handed from person to person. That swaying, the corners of the door making lunges at the passers-through, only just being prevented from making contact. Those corners could hurt someone. One day, those corners are going to hurt someone. The doors are going to show their evil ways and bring ruin upon us.

Doors are the enemy. My vigilant hand is the only thing that is preventing them from taking over. I am the Holder of Doors.

I was thinking, it has probably been over a decade since I’ve ridden a bicycle. It feels strange to know this. I had bikes as a kid, like, most of the time, I think. One of my first jobs involved me riding from place to place on bicycles. But then there was this Summer when I was seventeen or so where I had two bikes stolen from my shed, mere months apart, and after that I just didn’t get another one.

I live in the city side of the city now. There are more cars here than there were in Eastern Passage. I’m not sure how comfortable I’d be riding a bike on these streets. I am confident that I would still be physically able to ride a bike though. Remembering how to ride a bike is so easy that there’s an expression about it, after all.

It has also been bizarrely long since I have:

• Been to a dentist
• Eaten cereal
• Seen an episode of any Star Trek

What is the world coming to?

I have been brushing my teeth for decades. I have been using this one sink in my apartment for something like nine years. After all that time and all that experience, when am I going to stop spitting on the faucet? This happens at least once a month.

Yesterday evening I was feeling groggy after a large family meal and I thought, as I do several times a year “I’ll just have a nap” and I let myself drift off to sleep. Now I’m waking up just a few hours before I should actually be going to sleep. Napping is not a skill that PDR possesses.

When I go to sleep, my body apparently thinks “Well, let us make this stick as long as possible” no matter what I think. I seem to be getting more and more able to turn off my alarm without waking and, unless my phone is lying to me, I seem to have checked a text message in my sleep yesterday. I value awake-times much more than sleep-times and this is not ideal. I guess it is my own fault for making naps such a rare part of my habits. I never slept on buses or in school or any of the places I could have trained my nap-senses (the only time I’ve even slept on an airplane was on a fourteen hour flight and was a proper sleep, not a nap). I suppose this is my own fault for not fostering proper napabilities when I could. And now, something must be done. I guess, from this point on, I just need to tell myself: No more naps. If I feel like I could use a nap, I am to tell myself “Shut up, dummy!” and stick to awakeness.

Well, I’ve really got no point to this complainy post save that I felt like I should write something to account for my confusion of my sleeping schedule (Also I’m not quite awake yet). Gotta get something out of it. Still, as I said quite recently, I’m big on dreams. My dream last night had dinosaurs. That counts as a point in my favor, but now I have to try to readjust in time for work tonight… We shall see.

Back when Geocities decided to commit suicide and take all our hard work with it, I lamented the death of my first website, the Adam West Batcave, but I’m just remembering something else that Geocities took too. I had once created a website devoted to telling the world that Patrick D Ryall sucks.

I think I called the site “geocities.com/pdrsucks/” and on it I wrote from the point of view of a person who supposedly knew me in school and had an intense distaste for me. I’m pretty sure I only got a few paragraphs of insane ranting done, but I had always planned to get back to it. Unfortunately, as time passed, I forgot about it. It likely would have come back to me at some point, but then I forgot about it when it mattered most, at the end of the Geocities era. When I got everything from the Batcave, I forgot to get to pdrsucks and save what I had done. I could have transferred it to some blog somewhere or something. So now all that is lost. I never linked to the site anywhere, because it wasn’t finished, so I doubt it exists in any cache online anywhere. It is lost to the ages.

I remember I told Kiiip about it as I was doing it, but I never told Marq. In fact, the entire reason I was building a site about how much I suck was because I hoped, someday, it would get into search engines Marq would stumble across it and be amazed. But now that will never happen…

So anyway, Marq, now you know. Maybe my finally telling you this could be considered your birthday gift since I got you zero ones for your actual birthday last weekend?