If everyone else is playing checkers and you’re playing chess, that doesn’t mean you’re smart, it means you’re losing at checkers.

I just remembered that I once vomitted out a tenth story window. So I can’t say I’ve done nothing with my life.

More New Sentences!

A few years back I did a post full of sentences that, according to search engine searching, did not exist on the Internet until I bravely created them. I’m doing it again! More sentences!

Go!:

  • “We need more rocketship movies.”
  • “Tomorrow is just later today if you don’t sleep.”
  • “I could probably make it rain if I wanted.”
  • “What’s your favourite type of chain link fence?”
  • “The stealth bomber was invented by ninjas.”
  • “I burned down my castle for the insurance money.”
  • “The light is always greener on the other side of the tunnel.”
  • “Most operas don’t end with a car chase.”
  • “Grapes can be your best friend, if you let them.”
  • “The devil knows how to build a rowboat.”
  • “I’m falling in love with this luggage.”
  • “The internet has more sentences on it.”

There! I’ve added to the wealth of humanity’s knowledge!

In truth, 90% of the time when I post to Twitter it’s just because my tweets are embedded on my website and I just want something to break up the stuff there.