An Open Letter To My MP3 Player

Dear My MP3 Player,

I lost you on the bus, I think, or maybe when I was just getting onto the bus. My MP3 player, I assure you that it wasn’t intentional. I had you playing, as I always did, and a song had just ended as I was getting on the bus, so I wasn’t surprised when I didn’t hear music for a moment, but then when I didn’t hear a song start up again, I checked for you and only found the end of the headphone cord. You were gone. Maybe you caught on something as I stepped onto the bus and fell onto the ground. I couldn’t find you on the floor of the bus.

You may have been an old MP3 player that I would often find reason to complain about. You had no option to play randomly and you had to spend three minutes “updating” every time I recharged you. But you were purple, which was cool. And you took a lot of damage, which is a useful skill for anything I own. You served me well for several years and now I miss you.

But that isn’t the main reason for this letter, MP3 Player. The main thing I need to say is that you are an MP3 Player, you can not read letters. Please stop reading this. It is freakin’ me out. Stop it.

Yours ponderously,
Patrick D Ryall

  1. Someone probably took it. Get Liam Neeson to help get it back. We will need a Taken 3 after the second one comes out. It could be about him saving your MP3 Player.

  2. If you play with fire, you’re likely to get burned.

    If you play in the water, you’re likely to get wet.

    If you roll in the dirt, you’re liable to get dirty.

    If you frolic in the air… hrm.

    • Frolicking seems the best bet, but it sounds hard. I’m gonna play in the water. I don’t mind getting wet.

  3. If you frolic in the air,you’ll get wind up your skirt.

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