So far being not at work is already feelin’ fine. I’ve gotten many errands done quicker than I usually do. And it’s only Saturday morning! Sweet. Let’s see if I can’t do something worthwhile with the time yet to come.

Of course, I’ve also got to waste some time. With that in mind we got Joust for the NES. I can’t say I’m any better at games than I ever was, but at least I’m playing a classic.

The only really pitfall of my time off is that my computer has betrayed me. Well, betrayed me is kind of a strong word. It implies my computer used to be on my side. My computers have always been about rolling their own way. I can hitch a ride and get some benefits from it, but they don’t really care if I’m doing well or not. This particular laptop had been doing strange things such as constantly turning the volume to maximum, making the letter “b” appear for no reason when I hit enter, insert, delete, right shift or the arrow keys and occasionally turns off its own ability to pick up wireless. Troublesome, but I was used to it.

But now it has all changed! Now it is constantly turning the volume to minimum, making the letter “c” appear for no reason when I hit enter, insert, delete, right shift or the arrow keys and occasionally turns off its own ability to pick up wireless. The primary problem with this is that, when my volume is maxed out, I can still listen to it. When it is minimal I can not. I have had music to play me to sleep since listening to the radio as a child and though I can sleep without it, I am convinced that I don’t sleep as well. I wake up feeling bad when I don’t have music as I fall asleep. I don’t know why, but it seems to be backed up. Also, without volume, watching the Daily Show and Colbert becomes pretty hard.

As for the change from letter “b” to letter “c”, that just freaks me out because I can almost imagine reasons why those buttons might accidentally write one letter, but for it to suddenly switch letters it just hurts my brain.

Computers, man. They’re complicated.

Apparently these problems are not uncommon with my particular make of laptop. I’m not about to open my laptop up and pull a plug any time soon as one dude suggests, but man I would like to. I just fear I would kill the computer in the process.

Anyway, later.

I have it on the good authority of people I trust that I once attended and graduated from something called High School. It doesn’t sound like something I would do, but I suppose people would know better than I do. So anyway, tomorrow is the reunion for people who graduated this strange place. while plenty of people are not going to be showing up because they live other places, or they have no interest or maybe they died of AIDs while robbing a liquor store, but I will be attending this thing.

The strange thing is, though, that apparently this gathering is just a bunch of people from the school going to some bars and drinking. On television and movies school reunions are always ceremonies in gymnasiums and people get awards for travelling the least distance to get there (or at least Homer Simpson did) but this is just a bar. Oh well. I guess if I want a classier more television-style reunion, I should go to school in television. I shall have to work on that.

Today I went and got my hair cut. A memory of my youth returned to me. At a haircutting place that I was brought as a child, children were encouraged to, once the cut was over, pick up a bit of their hair from the floor and place it in a little box. You would close the box and the “Hair Fairy” would take your hair and replace it with a cheap toy like you’d get in one of those twenty-five cent vending machines. Obviously the hair just fell into the device (probably into a bag if the people who made it had any sense) and the toy would fall out from some other place which was no doubt a heavenly reservoir of cheap toys and I don’t think that even in my youngest days I believed in the Hair Fairy because the mechanism was so obvious looking. But I believe in the Hair Fairy now. Because someone should.

Maybe I’d get my hair cut a little more often if I still had such awesome reasons to do so.

I admit I am kind of wary of looking up “Hair Fairy” in Google, however. I don’t even want to know where that could lead.

In other news, I took a trip across town to Future Shop today with intent to buy the latest season of the Venture Brothers and use up some of the many Future Shop gift cards I have accumulated over the last few years worth of Christmases and Birthdayses. The bad news is that there was no Venture Brothers season three (or any Venture Bros. at all, it is sad to say) but the good news is that even after a bit of a spending spree I still have eighty-eight dollars worth of gift certified at Future Shop. Not bad.

Haiku!

Captain Amsterdam!
A frog with a heart of gold.
And twice the power.

I have decided that there must be a holiday about index fingers. Perhaps a day when we’re not allowed to use our index fingers for anything, just to remind us how useful such fingers are. And people who have lost their index fingers can speak at big public events. And those foam fingers from sports can be made into decorations for our houses. Someone should get working on that.

So, I’ve had this wart on my finger for a few years now. I’m getting annoyed with it. In my dimly remembered youth I had a wart on my thumb for a while and got rid of it with a product called Compound W. That worked just find back then. But this time, I’ve used the stuff so much that I have on two occasions burned this wart down until there was a concavity in my finger. Both times the wart has grown back. As I say, this is starting to annoy me. But then, I don’t see any other way of getting rid of the thing so I’ll be burning it down a third time, I guess.

Also, after I titled this post, I went back to check for my previous post about my wart. That is also named after Wart from Mario 2. Apparently that is just where my mind goes when the topic comes up.

And the freeze-ray thing I mentioned in that post… Obviously it didn’t work either.

So it has been about nine months since my last post. The reason being: I was adopted by pirates. That, or it’s been a few weeks and I’ve just been lazy. Though I can use the slowness of my spyware filled browser as part of an excuse…

Now, on a daily basis I come up with fascinating things to write about on my little journal thing (and as you readers know, on a bi-annual basis I actually get around to posting one!) so let’s see if I can’t remember some of the things that occurred to me over the past few weeks, lest this become yet another post in which my only content is a reflection of the lack of content.

Winter has hit us here in Hali-town. We’ve had several snowfalls already. We’ve probably already had a quarter or more of the total snows we had last year, which I don’t remember being quite so busy. I have noted that these days any time it snows is referred to as a
“snowstorm”. It’s never just snowing anymore, it’s always a “snowstorm” and the whole city shuts down and schools are cancelled and people start crashing their cars all over the place and all that. I think back to my childhood and remember us actually getting far more snow and the city not breaking down. My question is: Has the snow actually somehow become more violent even though it usually clears up before we get towering snowbanks, or has the city just become one big collective weather wuss?

It also occurred to me at one point during these weeks that I don’t know my own age as readily as a person is probably supposed to do. I have to think about it longer that I probably should. Is that a bad thing? A plus side is that I’ll be thinking about how I’m twenty-eight and then realize, oh wait, I’m not twenty-eight yet and won’t be for over half of a year and it’s like for a moment I got a free bonus year.

Haiku!

My suicide tooth.
I can break it when I want.
But can it break me?

A few weeks back there was a night when I only three hours of sleep (actually there have been several like that since my last post, but I’m talking of a specific one). The thing is, the dream I had felt like it took at least three hours if not longer. I understand the thing about dreaming actually taking place in a shorter amount of time than it feels, but it really felt like I’d been dreaming longer than I’d been asleep. Anyway, the dream was about me conducting job interviews for some position that doesn’t exist in reality at some business that doesn’t exist in reality. I apparently had two openings and four applicants (three women, one man). Over the course of the interviews it occurred to me that the man was a complete moron and that I’d two of the women would be getting the jobs and I was starting to get worried that people would talk about me filling the business with just women (you know, like “Look at PDR over there building himself a little harem…”) and I was spent a great deal of time trying to figure out how to do it tactfully. It wasn’t easy considering I had been conducting the interviews in a crowded cafeteria with each of the applicants sitting at a different crowded table but totally able to hear the other interviews. At any rate, I managed to awake before I actually had to do anything. For the record, the third woman who was interviewed was also a moron.

Also for the record, outside of the dream, my harem is totally hiring.

I was going to do some commentary on Christmas as well while I was here, but this is long enough and why waste the content of a post I could do “tomorrow” right?