Driving Tip: It’s impossible to exceed the speed limit while driving in reverse, because you’re technically going negative speed. In a hurry? Reverse!
I am the kind of chump who read Animal Farm and said “Hey, I’m just like Boxer” and then did not change at all, but at least I know it.
Hey rich people. Sure, maybe you’re rich in money, but I’m rich in self respect. I mean, not really, but I assume you hate yourself more than me. You probably don’t, but it’s something for me to cling to, right? Maybe you hate yourself too? Right? Maybe?
Power outages are power outrageous.
*uses last of phone’s charge to make sure that gets to the Internet*
