I sometimes worry that I’ll get roped into speaking to a child and I’ll find out that it doesn’t like dinosaurs and I will lose all hope.

Sure, I’ve got an essay due in three days, but I’ve only seen this episode of Frasier four or five times.

When people say something “stunts your growth” that means it does cool flips and stuff while you get taller, right?

Isn’t it weird how we drive on a parkway and we curl up in the fetal position and cry for the sweet release of death in a driveway?

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