I want to open a journalism school. There’d be teachers and whatever to teach the stuff that needs to be taught, but I would be in charge of the final exam. I’d make up a new story about a whale and then the students would have to do an article about it. Any student who uses the phrase “Whale of a tale” would be failed and punched.

Haiku!

I need a new leg.
My old leg was eaten up.
It was delicious.

If evolution is real, why can’t sharks walk? They get tons of experience points from killing people all the time, obviously one of the sharks would have got legs when it levels up by now. Therefore, I have disproved evolution.