At last! The New Avengers Revealed! [SPOILERS]
Using Your Alien Hero's powers of ESP, I have read/looked at/scanned the mind of Bendis himself, and caught a one-day-early look at the new lineup, and this extract from New Avengers
#1!
---------------
: "Who would ever have thought that Iron Man was the traitor? Again. And that I'd have to recruit a whole team of teenaged Avengers from an
alternate past to stop him after he killed all the other Avengers? And now Nick Fury's hand-picked a new team of Avengers who'll appeal more to our public?"
: "Avengers Assemble!"
: "Dude!"
: "......could be worse, I suppose."
: "Speedo Hulk am here!"
: "No!"
: "Where are his pants?"
: "Mental Organism Designed Only for Killing in the house!"
: "Oh Lordy."
: "Hey, bub."
: "You can't be an Avenger! Avengers don't kill!"
:"Tell it to Baron Blood, bub."
: "Dude!"
: "Or that ULTIMATUM guy."
: "Didn't you kill the Red Skull twice, too?"
: "But that never counts! He came back!"
: "Hulk get powers from radiation, and Hulk think 'Now Hulk radioactive. That can't be good'."
: "Hey, Murdock! Bub!"
: "I don't know who that is."
: "Oh, just give it up already, we all know."
: "Yeah, it's all over the news that you're really blind lawyer Matt Murdock."
: "Dude!"
: "I still don't know who that is. And I can see perfectly."
*Daredevil walks into a wall*
: "Even Hulk know you really Mike Murdock."
: "No, you fool! Mike was my brother. And he was really Daredevil, but now he's dead, only I actually just made him up, and....aw, crap!"
: "Dammit, Hulk, would you put some pants on?"
: "So, I ever tell you guys about how I slept with every single one of the X-women?"
: "Dude!"
: "Even the dead ones?"
: "You hear them saying 'no', bub?"
: "Dude!"
: "What, even all those under-age ones?"
: "Yeah, bub."
: "Dude!"
: "And then I came out."
: "Dude!"
: "Hulk love Logan!"
: "Duuuuuude!"
: "If only AIM had made me the Mental Organism Designed Only for Making Hulk Put Pants On...."
The above is a parody. All characters ™ © Marvel Comics.
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