So this is Halloween. And what have I done?

It’s here. Tonight is my favorite holiday of the year. But instead of participating in it at all, I have about a half an hour before I leave for work. This depresses me, but it depresses me any night I go to work. So no surprise.

Your Homework.

Here’s a list of words related to Halloween:

  • Ghost.
  • Black.
  • Corpse.
  • Skeleton.
  • Scary.
  • Dead.
  • Darkness.
  • Monster.
  • Goblin.
  • Candy.

Please take some and use other words to join them together into sentences.

Example: The Ghost Monster took the Black Candy from the Corpse under cover of Darkness.

You wil be graded on neatness and depravity.


This guy was totally baking a fried ham when it bit him. Surprised that his ham had a mouth, teeth and the necessary musculature to bite he took it back to the store from which he’d bought it. The storeowner explained that that particular ham was always troublesome. The man got his money back and the storeowner threw out the ham. The end.

That’s neither a joke nor a story, really. It’s just a paragraph about a ham that could bite.

Hot Metal.

Evolution was not kind to toasters. Of all the humble devices to evolve from hot metal, I think the toasters got the worst of it. Poor guys.

Let’s see… Halloween approaches! My favorite holiday and I have nothing to show for it. Aside, of course, from all the merchanidise I buy. Other than that: Nothing. I’ll honestly have to try to write something before work tomorrow.

That’s it for me. How sad.